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Funerals

"I am the Resurrection and the Life."
John 11:25
 

Funerals are always difficult, but they are important as a way of marking the end of a person's life here on earth. Family and friends come together to express grief, give thanks for the life lived and commend the person into God's keeping. A Christian funeral is a time when we pause at the mystery of death and life. It may be a small, quiet ceremony or a large occasion in a packed church or funeral home chapel.

 

As Anglicans, we believe it is the responsibility of the Christian Church to surround the grieving family and friends with love and prayer when someone they love dies. Our faith teaches us to live in hope because of the Resurrection of Jesus Christ and we are promised life beyond death. Our Rector or Assistant Curate will do everything possible, after discussion with you, to make the funeral service a meaningful tribute to the deceased person and an expression of Christian hope. He or she will give pastoral assistance in your time of grief as you may find appropriate.

 

At The Time of Death
While it is always recommended that you speak to the clergy before consulting the Funeral Director, we understand this may not always be possible. The Funeral Director provides professional services in order to make plans for the wake, if it is desired, and the Funeral or Memorial Service. Please ensure that your plans are communicated to the clergy, either in person or through the Funeral Home. The priest will make every effort to accommodate your needs.

 

Planning the Service
The service should enable those grieving to express our love for the deceased and to commend them to God. Above all, it is a time to remember a loved one in light of our Christian faith and our belief in Resurrection and eternal life.

 

Location of the Service
The normal place for Anglican funerals is in the church building. It is a sacred place of beauty and prayer, where we are surrounded by the signs of our faith. We say farewell in the place where we are reminded of the faith of the Church and of which the building is a symbol. It is no extra effort to have the funeral in the church however, part of the beauty of our churches in Bon Accord and Gibbons is their intimate size, and this must be considered. The chapel in a funeral home which is larger may be preferred or necessary in order  to accommodate the mourners.

 

A brief burial service at the graveside may be chosen by some and the priest will be present if requested.

 

Final decisions on location should be made after consulting the priest.

 

Type of Service
Families may choose a funeral service from the Book of Alternative Services or The Book of Common Prayer. The specific type of service depends on the location of the service. When the service is in the church, Holy Communion or the Holy Eucharist may be celebrated. These services usually have the casket or ashes present.

 

The Holy Eucharist or Communion is a most appropriate way to celebrate our faith in Jesus who said that He is the Bread of Life. It anticipates the banquet of heaven and Holy Eucharist joins our early praise with the praise of the hosts of Heaven. Eucharist is encouraged at funerals, especially if the deceased was a regular communicant. Words alone must surely fail, but by God’s grace, Holy Communion brings peace through silence and spiritual fellowship. All baptised Christians may receive Communion and is for all whom have gathered. Under no circumstances will the Bread and Wine be received by the family only and to the exclusion of the congregation.

 

A Service of the Word without Holy Eucharist or Communion may take place in the church or funeral home. Psalms, Bible Readings, hymns and prayers are part of this service.

 

A Memorial Service may be held without the casket or ashes and even scheduled at a much later date. It, too, may be either a Eucharist or Service of the Word as above.

 

About the Service
An Anglican funeral service usually follows a specific pattern or liturgy and for this reason, families should know that in the Anglican tradition there is an expectation that those who mourn will stand for the hymns, prayers, and the Creed as an expression of our combined and living faith. Because of the emotional stress involved, the occasion of a funeral is not the time to press for changes in accepted church practices, Please consult with the priest before making any final decisions. The following apply to services at any location.

 

Hymns and music should be chosen with an emphasis on eternal life in Christ and the hope of Resurrection. The priest can discuss hymns with you and is prepared to make suggestions. Soloists, instrumentalists, etc., who may be desired by the family are accepted under the direction of the priest. All music chosen to be played during the service should reflect the themes of the Liturgy.

 

Bible readings are always part of the service and usually chosen in consultation with the priest. There may be two or three readings, one being from the Gospel, plus a Psalm. You are encouraged to invite family members or friends to read the scriptures and lead the prayers. The priest will usually preach a sermon based on the readings.

 

Funerals are not to be an expression of praise of the deceased, but of how God has worked in and through the person who has died. For this reason, eulogies have never been a formal part of the Anglican worship tradition. It is hoped that expressions of tribute, praise and love have been given to a person before they died. If a eulogy is desired, please discuss with the clergy before the service as it should reflect the essence of the individual and not be a list of biographical facts and dates.

 

Like eulogies, personal comments or messages from friends or family members and visual PowerPoint presentations are not normally part of an Anglican funeral service. Visual presentations, lengthy and personal stories and anecdotes are best shared at the reception or in a social setting. If a personal message or visual presentation is desired, please discuss with the clergy before the service and be conscious of the fact that the funeral is a religious service.

 

Fraternal groups, upon the consent of the Rector and following the guidelines outlined by our diocese, are welcome to take their place in the celebration of the life of the deceased person. The services of lodges and other organizations will not be confused or combined with the burial office and committal. Such rites will take place before or after the service in the church.

 

By longstanding custom and for practical reasons, Sundays are not days on which a funeral can be held since clergy have their time committed to regular Sunday worship service(s).

 

The Committal of the Body — whether ashes or a casket — usually takes place immediately after the service or as soon as convenient. It is the duty of the Church to ensure a reverent burial because the grave is a place of hope, made holy by Jesus.

 

Reception Following the Service
Two of our churches have small halls available for a reception following the service (maximum 30 people).

 

Costs and Fees
The ministry of the church is free and there is no cost for a funeral service in the church.  However, an honorarium is traditionally paid to the church organist in recognition of his/her ministry. If the reception is held in the church hall,  a small administrative fee for the heat, light, cleaning, etc., of the Hall may may apply. If the family wishes, they may give a Free-Will- offering to the Priest who conducts the Funeral Service. If your finances are causing you distress, please be assured that the church turns no one away.

 

Memorials and Gifts
There are many worthy causes, but please consider your church. When requesting memorial donations, please consider suggesting the Church Memorial Fund or the Primate’s World Relief and Development Fund. Please also consider remembering your church in your own Will.

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